Down With the Patriots

There are a few things that I have come to truly despise in life. Math would certainly not be a stranger to that category, vegetables will never be found anywhere on my dinner plate and, although I’ve never seen one, I imagine a scorpion would send me running for the hills.

However, as time has gone by in the past few years, I have developed a new and perhaps more serious hatred: The New England Patriots.

With a 21-12 palindrome victory over San Diego, New England is one step away from making all of my wildest nightmares a reality. Even though San Diego had every opportunity to really jump ahead of the undefeated Patriots, they were forced to settle for field goal after field goal, and eventually ran out of time. However, no matter how many close calls the Patriots have had this season, they always seem to find a way to win.

Wahoo, good job New England. At least we all know the Patriots do things classy. Whether it’s putting spy cameras on opponent’s sidelines to capture play calls, or dancing on other team’s logos after victories, the Patriots always seem to have the utmost respect for all foes.

Seriously though, in all fairness, New England is the first team in history to achieve 18-0, and is one more win away from a fourth title in seven years. It’s only fitting that the Patriots last roadblock on the way to perfection is the New York Giants. Baseball boasts one of sports’ best rivalries in the Yankees and Red Sox, and this game could very well set up another one in the exact same areas.

At this point, I don’t care what it takes, but the Giants need to find a way to win this game. Seeing Tom Brady and his smug smile holding up yet another Superbowl trophy could be enough to make me toss my cookies. There is certainly some hope for the Giants, as these two teams played just a few weeks ago, with the Patriots escaping with a close victory.

Duller than math, more disgusting than veggies, and scarier than a scorpion, here come the Patriots – the definition of an evil empire, trying to rule the football world once again. Playing the roll of the ultimate good guy, the Giants will try to end the Patriots run just one game shy of ultimate perfection.

If for no more than one game, I’m as big a Giants fan as my grandpa from New York is. This isn’t a matter of bandwagoning, but a matter of proving there’s still right in this world. The last quarterback to beat the Patriots was Peyton Manning, and now Eli Manning has his chance to immortalize that family name not only in football history, but in my own heart as well.